Hey Dads...Listen Up!

This is one of my rare serious posts, directed at the dads of my future sons-in-law.  I ask that you please bear with me.
For Father's Day, Bridget got me a box of chocolate dipped fortune cookies.  She and Claire have been dying - DYING I tell you - to have one.  Last night Claire asked if she could, to which I replied "of course you can!".  After eating the chocolate part, she eagerly pulled out the fortune and started reading it.  Her fortune read, in essence, everyone thinks you're cute and outgoing, which is quite true!  When I told her that, she looked puzzled.  After a short time thinking about it she looked at me and said, "Mortimer (name changed) doesn't think so.  He called me fat and stupid".
Now for some background.  Mortimer and Claire were in the same kindergarten class.  Claire, somehow, became the friend in kindergarten who sticks up for people when they are bullied or picked on.  She is friendly to everyone in class, even the "hard" kids that no one else likes or plays with.  For me as a dad to hear that made me both upset and sad.  After fighting the initial urge to go find Mortimer's dad and beat the crap out of him, I let Claire know that she is neither, and that I love her very much.  Now, does this qualify as fat shaming?  Maybe.  Am I letting this bother me more than Claire is letting it bother her?  Probably.  But that's OK, because I'm her dad and that's what we dads do, right??
So, here is the meat of this post; if you're a dad reading this, and you have a son, do me a favor...please teach him to respect girls/women early.  Don't put it all on the girls to "learn to deal with it".  It may be funny to him at the time, but it's something that stays with girls for a long time.  I don't need to have a 6 year old first grader with body image and nerd image issues.
That is all.

Goals and Priorities...(mostly for me!)

Wow, it has been a while, hasn't it?  The past year has seen some exciting changes, which will be detailed later.
This is all about what I call my "Before-Audrey-Graduates-Bucket-list".  This list came about as result of two things, 1) a poor parenting exchange this morning, and 2) Audrey's entrance into junior high school.  This is to help me, hopefully, be a better dad.  Here is the list, with items listed in no particular order:

1.       See the 2017 total solar eclipse in Casper WY

2.       Ski in Colorado

3.       Teach her to drive a stick

4.       Watch her perform:

A.      A solo violin recital

B.      In an Orchestra

C.      In a Company dance recital

5.       Help her pick out a class ring

6.       Help her through a breakup

7.       Take her to dinner for a report card with straight A’s

8.       Help her make the Dean’s list

9.       Watch her play in a varsity volleyball game

10.   Help her apply for college

Some of these are no-brainers, but that doesn't diminish the importance of them.  Others are there to remind me to offer as much help and support as I can.  Do I expect that Audrey and I will be able to cross all of these items off?  You're damn straight I do!!

To Claire...

Well, it's here. You're finally five! I constantly have to remind myself that when you act like a five year old, you're acting your age.
Well do I remember the long nights when you were just a baby, walking laps in the family room, whistling the Notre Dame fight song, or Utah Man. You cried even harder if it was anything else.
And my how you've grown! And my how smart you are! I still think back with amazement on you saying your first word; phalanges.

Sweetheart, there is so much ahead of you. I hope you enjoy the next five years (and beyond) as much as you've enjoyed the first five! I love you. You make me very proud everyday. I love watching you learn and grow. You will always be my little Claire-bear!

Joyeux anniversaire, Claire-ours!

Adventures In Bedroom Swapping...

Now that Audrey is in 6th grade, and owing to the fact that side-drop cribs are parent-from-hell deathtraps, we have had a shuffle in the sleeping arrangements for the girls. See if you can follow along:

Audrey has moved from her and Claire's room to Bridget's room. Bridget has moved to Claire's room, but not on bunk beds as we don't want either to plummet to an untimely demise from the top bunk. Audrey got a new bed, but not the daybed that she and Jen were hoping for. It has under the frame drawers, but only one set of four, not the two sets of four that are on the showroom at the furniture store we bought it from. And now Audrey and I are sharing a bathroom. Bridget's half of the no-longer-bunk-beds only has one rail, but "Big Pillow" is on the floor in case she tumbles the two feet to the floor.

So everyone is now "happy", except for me as I realize that my girls are growing up.

The Latest Earworms (a.k.a. The Songs That Get Stuck In Your Head) At Our House...

Earlier this month we went on a family camping trip (which, by itself, is a whole other post!) and Jen made a CD for Claire and Bridget to listen to on the way to the mountains. Not realizing the extent of the explicit lyrics to I Love It (radio edit provided) we popped in the CD and down the road we went.
Then, last week, Jen's brother sent a text regarding the best app ever. Dumb Ways To Die is now a game. It is a pretty funny video, and the game itself appears to be quite entertaining.

I gotta tell ya, hearing I Love It immediately followed by Dumb Ways To Die is bad enough. It's worse when the get stuck in my head ALL. DAY. LONG. Its to the point now that I'm doing an internal mashup in my head.
However, its rather hysterical to watch Bridget dance to and scream along with I! DON'T! CARE! - I LOVE IT, then mimic some of the dead dancers (my personal favorite is the super glue eater!).

And now that you're doing your own internal mashup, here's the surefire cure for getting songs unstuck from your head!

For Want Of A Leotard...

For those of you who are new, or may not be aware, Audrey belongs to a dance studio located by our house. Wednesday she received her costume for her Jazz Dance class, and was told what time to be at the studio for pictures (whoa, wait...PICTURE time? Already???) on Saturday. As soon as we get home, she tells Jen the news/time and goes about her evening.

And Estrogen Hell has ensued ever since! All because we cannot find Audrey's nude colored leotard. Each night since, and all this morning has been a cry/fit/yell fest, for which the only remedy has been the promise of a new leotard.

Perhaps its because I'm a guy, or maybe because I'm inherently lazy, but for want of a leotard...

Deeper and Deeper...

So, over the Veterans Day weekend, some more estrogen was added to the pool. I met my sister Kim, her daughter Melina, my step-mom Debbie, and my soon to be sister-in-law Sara. These new arrivals will add even more new dimensions to my already vast array of testosterone laced goofs.

The good news is that I met Kim's boyfriend/Melina's dad Kirk, and Sara's fiance (my brother!!!) Brian as well. So, hooray for me. While the pool just got a little deeper, I also have a couple of new testosterone based life preservers!